knoddy goes to school

here in planet ntu, life is sorta mundane, school sucks royal dick, exams stress blah. there are however ways to perk up knoddy's life. hockey is one. but the main interest of this post is *drum roll*... the fine art of femme appreciating. having been through almost 3 semester(wow!) of undergrad life, i can safely classify girls from my school into the following category. behold!

1) miss ‘it's all about the image’
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this phenomenal category has taken the planet by storm in such a short period of time. a distinct feature of this class of girls is that they are fricking dressed to kill. coming to school is like going for wednesdays zouk. by now i'm sure most of you can picture how they are dressed. another sure way to spot them is when they are walking from lessons to lessons. these ladies make full use of every chance they have to sashay and practise their catwalks and when in groups (strictly of not more than three), they have to proceed in a single horizontal file. no two ways about it. hmmm come to think about it they quite fit my description of 'ssluts' (why the double 's' some might ask. that you gotta refer to my earlier post on 'war on s*aggism'). other prominent aspects include more than noticeble make-up, very done up hair, perpetual gigglings/gossiping or discussion of the latest trend, and wandering eyes to ascertain if their efforts are paying off. school to them is 80% image, 20% others. eye candies? sure, but these are the kind of girls my mama told me to stay away from.

2) miss 'i'm so effin' sporty'
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the adjective 'sporty' has taken on a whole new meaning in my planet. this category of girls never fails to get on my nerves and yet amuses me. typical 'sporty' girl look: coconut husk coloured hair, relatively tanned, ntu sports club event singlet (wtf...) revealing their hot pink/red/orange sports bra, roxy mini board shorts and slippers. omfg right? these girls wear fricking singlets to school! no, not for their 'sporty' ecas, but for lessons! a majority of these girls attended the foc organised by sports club and therafter, want to get immersed into the 'sports club culture' which explains the existence of this category. their outfit shouts out "i'm damn into sports club/camp and therefore i'm sporty!", when in the first place none of them can actually play a sport well. those who can don't dress like that. foc is over, get over it! it's true some of these girls are pretty attractive but the matter of truth is... 99% of them look like lamb crap. fucking revolting i tell you.

3) miss 'i'm fugly/fat but thinks otherwise'
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it should be pretty self-explanatory from the title. these are the girls that gives me the uncontrollable urge to just wanna punch them in the face everytime i come across one. ok picture this in your head: an extremely ugly/fat girl... now make her even uglier and fatter, then fit her into either category 1 or 2. 有鬼啊!!!!!

4) miss 'i'm ugly and i know it'
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(un)fortunately for my eyes, the majority of girls in my planet fall under this category. they dress to the limits of their looks and figure, they do not try to be like girls in category 1 or 2 as they are aware of their ugliness or they simply don't give a shit. the main objective of coming to school is to study and get good grades. these are the kind of girls that we will not miss or notice if they just vanish into thin air. they must be really nice girls. *observes a minute of silence*

5) miss 'knoddy motivator'
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*hallelujah* after the few heart wrenching paragraphs above, the time has come for this class of chicks. these girls... they either look fantastic, cool, fucking cute, or they have a wonderful figure (and it goes on). their dress sense and overall outlook is superb, usually something that brings out their best physical features, and not to the overkill extend of those in category 1. it's easy to tell if i've seen one: they make me wanna take good second look at them, they make me miss my step, when i see them smile, my heart fucking melts. these are the kind of girls i tell myself "my day is frickin' made!" when i see them. most important of all, these are the kind of girls that make me wanna go to school everyday, not that i don't skip lessons la. sad to say these are a rare breed of girls in my planet...

6) mr 'help i'm trapped!'
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very little is known about this species of being other than these facts: they have spunky and weirdly dyed hair, wears baggy clothings, multiple piercings and might have a fucking chio girlfriend (jeezus...). intelligence found out that the locals refer to these beasts as 'butch'. knoddy figures they are from modern jazz club... no? definitely not from dragonboat right? aiyah the hell with them la.


phew! of course the above six categories are not all encompassing. there are still some areas left uncovered like our dear cs girls (maybe medster can give me the low-down? heh), the true blue sporty chicks from nie etc, but i'm too lazy to cover them all. man... what a long post.

knoddy ちゃん