are you a fucktype?

today's topic shall be.... fucktypes.

unless you're a poly guy or a fugly mofo, you should have enough friends or acquaintances who fall under the below few categories of... fucktypes.

1) the starhub mobile subscriber
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the advent of free incoming calls thanks to starhub spawned this breed of arseholes. typically these people will annouce to the whole world that they've just gotten a new starhub line and will irritably ask everyone to call him/her. how would you know if your friend is this fucktype? well your phone rings, and before you can answer it stops, compelling you to call back. fucking irritating. this kinda fucktype deserve to have their handphone shoved up their ass and made come through the mouth.

2) the full time bf/gf
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how often do you have friends, who are like you know, abangs and sistas claiming "fuck relationships! you guys are the best!" but when these same friends get attached, they totally disappear into thin air? once these people get into a relationship, their life fucking revolve around the other half. they have no time to meet up anymore because they gotta accompany their dearly beloved for the most absurd things.
the few times you actually get to meet them, they are constant-fucking-ly on the phone whispering sweet nothings at one korner, or busy sms-ing. any rare occurences of a conversation initiated by them will almost certainly be about their girlfriend or boyfriend and how great their sex life is.
consider yourself lucky enough if these friends remain contactable after their 'new lease of lovey dovey life'. some fuckers totally migrate to pluto after getting hitched.

3) the friend who fuck care old ties
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if i didn't remember wrongly, the period of time when we were in secondary school right up to jc were the most kick ass. most of the friends you made then are probably everywhere now, mostly in universities in my context. some of them in particular will be so fucking involved in hall and universities events that they simply have no time, or rather prefer not, to catch up on old times.
personally this category of fucktypes disses me off the most. don't they remember the good old raw untamed fun we had? surely there is time for catching up but no! they rather dwell in kan nin na hall/school shit that takes up 25 hours a day, acting important, being 'hall ambassadors', busking under the influence of new found 'kewl' friends, and the bottomline of all they just wanna get laid.
i have absolutely nothing against being part of such undergrad experience, myself being involved before as well. but to the point that you fuck care old ties? no way. sometimes seeing such friends have reduced to just a hi-bye affair since there's no longer a common topic of interest to chat about. as some might put it, these people fucking draw line once they enter university.

4) the quintessential fucker
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this kinda fucker, simply put is the mother of all fuckers. motherfucker. and thus the origin of the mentioned expletive. here at maisngsiao we learn something new everyday.
ok so this fucker encompasses all traits of the fucktypes already mentioned and not only that, they are back stabbers, play out kings, and worst of all, some are the cause of breakups and riffs in relationships. they pretend to be hearing out for a friend, providing advice for those in need but once their back is turned, they spread false rumors and other nasty stuff which i'm incapable of explaining it. i believe these people work for the devil. unfortunately for us, they are not easily identified due to the inexplicable stupidity of mankind. alas... (o__o)


there you have it.. fucktypes. this is actually a long overdue article which i embarked on since the beginning of the year but sad to say, i couldn't think of enough to substantiate the post. anyway the above 4 is just a rough guide. of course this post wouldn't have been successful without the help of certain assholey friends i have made over the million years for inspirations...

... but you know i still love you all the same guys! long live double standards!



"sometimes we say or do things that may seem correct, smart, funny, appropriate at the instance, but we ignore the fact that the very same words/actions may be piercing to someone else."

what a fucked up quote.

knoddy